


Cas You Can't Fight Bees

by Faultier



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bees, Just bees, No Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-12
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-06-01 19:05:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6532543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faultier/pseuds/Faultier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas decides he's gonna fight some bees.<br/>Chaos.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cas You Can't Fight Bees

**Author's Note:**

> I WROTE THIS BECAUSE OF @DAMMIT_CATSTIEL ON INSTAGRAM  
> It's completely unedited so there will be some spelling errors  
> And I'm tired so it's not really long and it's probably shitty.  
> Lmao hoe you guys enjoy

Dean liked his boyfriend a lot. Despite the fact that Cas was completely unorganized and would often eat a hundred hot pockets in one sitting. Dean was nearly the complete opposite. He’s in Harvard for college. He plays piano, the harp, the trombone, the french horn, and the guitar. He’s super organized (you had to if you wanted to be in Harvard). 

Castiel quit college, he hated it. So he works in the local coffee shop that was in competition with Starbucks (spoiler alert: Starbucks is winning). He’s way too lazy to wash his clothes half the time, and his apartment is a mess. Dean didn’t go over there if he didn’t have to, or else he felt compelled to clean it. 

Dean liked his boyfriend though. But this? This was ridiculous.

“Cas you can’t fight bees.” He said, watching Cas stare at the bees surrounding the hive that was grown on a tree in the park. Dean walked forward and had a hand on Cas’ shoulder. “C’mon babe, let’s go get lunch. I’m hungry.” 

“No Dean. I’m gonna fight these bees.” Cas said, hands on his hips. He reached forward to touch the hive. 

“Fucking hell who snuck you weed brownies again.” Dean mumbled under his breath. “I’m going for Meg’s throat this time and you can not stop me Cas!” 

“That was one time! And I’m completely sober Dean.” Cas swatted Dean’s hand away from him. “I’m gonna fight these fucking bees and nobody can stop me.” He tapped the hive, and bees swarmed out. Dean made a noise and backed away.

Cas, however, was standing very still. “Hey Dean! Guess what! If you just stand still, they don’t do anything!” He laughed. “Man bees are actually pretty cool. I’m sorry for saying I’d fight you bees.” 

Dean, however, was starting to yell. “Dean?” Cas said, looking over at his boyfriend. His boyfriend who was now shrieking and swatting the air. “Dean, just don’t move they’ll stop.”

“THEY’RE STINGING ME CAS. THEY’RE FUCKING STINGING ME–FUCKSHITOW!” Dean killed on and it fell off of his shoulder. “TAKE THAT FUCKER!” He yelled, swatting more. 

“Dean, there’s no need to fight them. Just stand still.” Cas tried again. However Dean just kept screaming. He yelled various insults, and after a few minutes it actually got boring. Cas was trying to keep still to avoid being stung but after a while it got boring.

“Man I wish I was high right now. It’d be more fun than watching your pathetic ass Dean.” Cas said, sighing. He decided enough was enough. “Alright in two seconds I’m gonna start running Dean. One, two!” 

Cas ran right for Dean, grabbing his boyfriend by the arm and tugging Dean with him. The two started running, and Cas made sure they ran away from the playground. He didn’t want the kids to be stung.

They, however, were being stung so badly, and Cas blamed Dean. If Dean had just stayed still none of this would have happened.

“GODDAMMIT DEAN YOU ALWAYS GET US IN TO MESSES LIKE THESE!” Cas yelled as they ran farther from the tree. “WHY AM I DATING YOU?”

“ME?” Dean yelled back, taking deep breaths between each word nearly. “I HAVE NEVER. I AM AN ANGEL. YOU ALWAYS GET US INTO SHIT. I HATE YOU.”

“NO YOU DONT YOU BITCH.” Cas yelled back as he pulled Dean into the port-a-potty that was at the park. He locked the door and turned to face Dean in the small space. 

“I never want to be this close to you in a port-a-potty again, Dean.” Cas said, staring up at Dean.

“My body hurts when can we leave.” Dean said, completely out of breath. 

“I dunno, but I’m bored wanna have sex?” Cas asked, already going for his pants, taking off the belt and everything. 

“Cas I’m not fucking you in a port-a-potty with children nearby and bees outside trying to kill us.” Dean nearly yelled, pulling Cas’ hands away from his pants. 

“Who said you’re fucking me?” Cas demanded, attempting to put his hands on his hips in the small area. 

“WHO SAID?” Dean exclaimed. “I SAI–No you know what? I’m not having this damn debate with you in here. No. I’m not.” He crossed his arms and turned away from Cas. 

“Well when you do that you basically answer who’s the one being fucked Dean.” Cas joked, Dean used his foot to kick Cas in the shins. “ _ Ow _ that hurt.” 

“Good. You deserve it.” Dean mumbled.

There was a knock on the port-a-potty door. 

“ARE YOU GUYS DONE IN THERE? I REALLY GOTTA PEE!” A little boy’s voice screamed. Dean and Cas’ eyes both widened as they turned to look at each other, and then Cas opened up the door.

The mother who was sitting by the park got up as soon as the two came out. With Cas’ naturally messy hair and Dean’s belt undone, she must have wildly misinterpreted what had gone down in the bathroom. 

“TIMMY!” She yelled, running over and grabbing her little boy’s hand. “We’re going home now, you can go potty there okay?” 

Dean and Cas watched her glare at them as she walked by. “In a public bathroom? Disgusting.” She whispered to them as she led her son away. 

Dean and Cas looked at each other before cracking up, both of them laughing for a good few minutes.

“Alright now let’s go get some stuff for our stings cause I hurt.” Cas said, rubbing a bee sting and wincing.

“Fine but you’re paying for it.” Dean replied.

“Am not.”

“Are too.” 

“Fuck you Dean.” 

“No I’ll be fucking you.” 

“We’ll see what happens when we get back to my place.” 

The two continued to bicker all the way to the pharmacy store, and all the way home. 


End file.
